Fetish Advice if you need it.

slimjim said:

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I am astounded that there is a second person who recalls "The Prisoner" If this wasn't among the finest pieces of television from the golden age of TV then who knows what is.

Whenever I mention The Prisoner I'm met with blank stares. Even my bud who is a born out of time (and wishes he were) a child of the sixties has no idea.

butt plugs in too long--there is a buttplug made like a jockstrap can wear it all time just keep it lubed up and make sure its not too round


gang green nips yeah too much pressure anywhere can cause the skin to go dead

Behrluvr said:

I am astounded that there is a second person who recalls "The Prisoner" If this wasn't among the finest pieces of television from the golden age of TV then who knows what is.

Whenever I mention The Prisoner I'm met with blank stares. Even my bud who is a born out of time (and wishes he were) a child of the sixties has no idea.

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There are lots of us who recall the show, and I believe there may even be an online group if one searches. I never missed a single episode, and there was even one that included a very short but interesting scene featuring Number 6 (Patrick MdGoohan) being caned by our fav little man. Being an afficionado of corporal discipline, I was captivated by that little tidbit of British schoolboyism, and had it stored for a long time on VHS, captured during a rerun of the series It was in either the last or next to last show of the series.

whisper said:

I remembered something I once saw when looking through different handcuffs and all, and now I got curious. Are you talking about something like these?

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EXACTLY! On the left is a standard Tie-Wrap, used in all kinds of industry and home use; on the right are plastic riot cuffs in use by many major police depts. Much cheaper than individual steel handcuffs. The plastic ones are worth about 50 cents, good steel cuffs are $50 or so.

hawtsean said:

EXACTLY! On the left is a standard Tie-Wrap, used in all kinds of industry and home use; on the right are plastic riot cuffs in use by many major police depts. Much cheaper than individual steel handcuffs. The plastic ones are worth about 50 cents, good steel cuffs are $50 or so.

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Ahhh but I still love the stainless steel ones with a good leather collar and a leech ... I actually used them yesterday to teach that boy not to call me daddy anymore... I believe it worked )

jaketoronto2004 said:

Ahhh but I still love the stainless steel ones with a good leather collar and a leech ... I actually used them yesterday to teach that boy not to call me daddy anymore... I believe it worked )

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I hope you mean a leash! Though I imagine a leech would also be quite an effective punishment.

haha ok mister!

1. I can't stop smiling/giggling during sex. I'm such a kid, and I know it can be such a turn off, especially for me when someone laughs. What should I do?

2. I'm a bottom but most of the time I can't take it. It hurts way too much, even if they guy is average in girth. I somehow like it reverse cowgirl position but not missionary.... why's that? And what advice can you give me to stretch.

3. I'm scared to have a loose asshole. I'm am super fucking tight it's not funny, looking at the pornstar asses sorta scare me, I don't want a hole like that. What should I do?

I actually do not have that much sex. Sex = overrated IMO

jeansGuyOZ said:

I hope you mean a leash! Though I imagine a leech would also be quite an effective punishment.

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Both P

Hawtsean, Thank you for this thread and your generous offer of advice. To start, do you know of any BDSM seminars/workshops that can help new players gain some important knowledge and skills? I would really like to get deeper into the experience but would like to do it with some pros to assist.

poison824 said:

haha ok mister!

1. I can't stop smiling/giggling during sex. I'm such a kid, and I know it can be such a turn off, especially for me when someone laughs. What should I do?

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On that one, there isn't any device or quick method. Best thing I can think of is to play (foreplay) lots with your partner before actual intromission (sticking it in). Get the giggles out of the way and let the arousal build until you NEED to have sex. That may help. These days, way too many people forget to arouse and tempt their partners with foreplay that spices up the actual lovemaking. That's another key - LOVEmaking as opposed to fucking. It's love that two people want to communicate to each other. Maybe not a long term thing, but love nevertheless.

poison824 said:

2. I'm a bottom but most of the time I can't take it. It hurts way too much, even if they guy is average in girth. I somehow like it reverse cowgirl position but not missionary.... why's that? And what advice can you give me to stretch.

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Whatever position works is the right one. For instance when I used to switch and take bottom (when young and just getting started in BDSM), I preferred to take it on my back, sorta like you mention. I liked looking in the eyes of the guy taking me. Still like that for sex and when playing rougher games that same position is great using various restraints.

Stretching is accomplished with small and thin, rounded plugs. Check out the adult stores in your area on google stuff online. Small dildos or plugs that are no bigger than your little finger are the way to start, and they are available if you shop around for them. Lots and lots of lube and taking time to do it verrrrrrry slowly and gently.........will acclimate your anal sphincter and passage to accomodate the eventual insertion of larger toys and dicks of course. Consider this - your sphincter stretches to permit the passage of a bowel movement, so it WILL stretch. The key is your mental and emotional readiness to receive the insertion.

poison824 said:

3. I'm scared to have a loose asshole. I'm am super fucking tight it's not funny, looking at the pornstar asses sorta scare me, I don't want a hole like that. What should I do?

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As above - small, well-lubed and gentle. I play with several guys who have taken lots of toys anally for several years, and all of them have pretty tight holes, no loose puckers.

poison824 said:

I actually do not have that much sex. Sex = overrated IMO

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It often is overrated simply because there is no fun in it. Try the foreplay that I suggested before any sex. See how that works for you, and make it an adventure, not just a quick fuck. It's meant to be fun and fulfilling.

jaketoronto2004 said:

Ahhh but I still love the stainless steel ones with a good leather collar and a leech ... I actually used them yesterday to teach that boy not to call me daddy anymore... I believe it worked )

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Presuming that leash is the word, that can be very provocative and disciplinary at the same time. Being submissive enough to allow control with a collar and leash is incredibly arousing to many guys - both Top and bottom. A boi who submits to me by kneeling nude at my feet, allowing me to collar and subdue him, is telling me that I am his chosen Master. The possibilities for pleasure are unbounded.

While the boi is leased, you can use the free end as a short whip or flogger to sting his back and butt and legs if the leash is long enough. A few flicks of the leash across his butt while in doggy position will quickly impart the needed lesson as to whom the boi must be obedient and responsive

DesertDougAZ said:

Hawtsean, Thank you for this thread and your generous offer of advice. To start, do you know of any BDSM seminars/workshops that can help new players gain some important knowledge and skills? I would really like to get deeper into the experience but would like to do it with some pros to assist.

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You're welcome, Doug. Trying it without some coaching can be tricky and even risky. If the AZ is for Arizona, you will find quite a few fetish clubs and organizations from which to choose. Google with the search string "bdsm clubs in arizona" and a wealth of info will pop up. Happy hunting! Fee free to pose any questions you have, I'll do my best to provide info.

haha thanks a lot hawtsean! I sorta just realised you give tailored advice to the more fetish type sex. But thanks heaps for the tips, I'll try them out the next time I do it loool

poison824 said:

haha thanks a lot hawtsean! I sorta just realised you give tailored advice to the more fetish type sex. But thanks heaps for the tips, I'll try them out the next time I do it loool

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No worries, poison824. Actually, your questions were totally on point and just as valid for any sexual preference - fetish or otherwise.

A word about electrostim

I was queried in a private message, and will offer some info in this thread, since it touches on an interesting part of BDSM.

Many guys and girls like to experiment with electric shock stimulation, or electrostim. If proper equipment is used with care, this is absolutely safe for most people. First off, the line voltage from your wall plug is NOT what we use in electro play. It is a very low current with sufficient voltage to penetrate the skin and conduct through the nerves. If anyone wants a full explanation of the neural pathways, that can be Googled.

Electro play is a refined and measured form of endurance testing, or intentional physical stress. Depending on where the electrodes are placed, the current can cause muscle contractions (they sell stuff like this promoted as weight loss and self-massage), or intense sensations in various parts of the body that approach painful levels. Remember that the point is to use a painful stimulus to produce a pleasurable effect afterward.

The main health concern in electro play is twofold - never use it on anyone with a known cardiac condition or a pacemaker:no:.....even a small stray current could kill them! The other area of concern is related to heart issues - NEVER place electrodes where the current would be conducted across the heart, or anywhere near the head (brain) for that matter.:no: Again, the medical issues are far too extensive to write here, just accept an experienced practitioner's advice on staying away from the upper chest or the head.

Yeah, I know that some electro play pics show the nips being used. That is a tricky thing and could end up very badly. My own experiences have shown me that lots of good stimulation can be had with electrode placement on the abdomen and lower. Obviously I cannot teach extensively, or guide this or any fetish from a forum; and anyone wanting to engage in BDSM practices should always deal personally (and locally) with others who have experience.

Just wanted to offer the same advice given privately to those reading this thread.

hawtsean said:

You're welcome, Doug. Trying it without some coaching can be tricky and even risky. If the AZ is for Arizona, you will find quite a few fetish clubs and organizations from which to choose. Google with the search string "bdsm clubs in arizona" and a wealth of info will pop up. Happy hunting! Fee free to pose any questions you have, I'll do my best to provide info.

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Thanks for your input, the AZ is kind of deceptive but my handle was started while living there but alas, I now reside in Minneapolis area. I am sure that search suggestion will pan out here as well. PM's welcome if anyone is from my area and could offer some guidance.

DesertDougAZ said:

Thanks for your input, the AZ is kind of deceptive but my handle was started while living there but alas, I now reside in Minneapolis area. I am sure that search suggestion will pan out here as well. PM's welcome if anyone is from my area and could offer some guidance.

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I just tried googling "bdsm clubs in minnesota" - a lot of info there for you, Doug, if you hadn't yet checked it out.

With regard to electro play I would like to add to Hawtsean's wisdom that when in comes to purchasing a power box you get what you pay for. Cheap is just that. If you want to fully enjoy the pleasures of estim plan to shell out plenty of money. Where you can save a ton is on the electrodes used. A hardware store has a myriad of useful products and work quite effectively. PM me if you would like advise on purchasing toys of this nature! I learned my lesson and can save you an expensive learning curve.